Most people I know avoid change. Those people who thrive on it, seek it, relish it, are usually known as nuts or thrill-seekers or drama queens. The rest of us like our comfy chairs, revel in our routines and predictable scenarios of day-to-day life, right?
Until it comes to buying something new. That new car? We love it when a friend gets one – we want to ride in it, sit in it, push all the buttons and listen to the engine. When someone gets a new house we all crowd around for the tour and bring housewarming gifts. Even better when it’s us who gets something new, isn’t it? Even though it’s primarily functional and meant for some concrete purpose, we still feel that grin creeping across our faces when we walk out to the parking lot and spot that sexy new car sitting there or open the closet and see those gorgeous new boots.
We get compliments on changes like new jobs and new relationships and can’t wait to share the news, so why do other changes freak us out so much? Is it only those changes we didn’t choose that are scary?
Losing your job is scary. Moving is scary, whether you choose it or not. Being in a situation where you can’t predict or control the variables puts most of us in a state of panic. The loss of something important to us is also stressful – for a child it can be moving on from their favorite teacher or having a friend leave town. Changes are usually complicated, but so often bring as many new opportunities as they do questions, and, honestly, the majority of changes in our lives are gradual.
Personally, then opportunity to have some level of predictability and control over any change gives me a much better chance of adapting to it positively. Maybe the trick is to remember that ‘control’ is an illusion except when it comes to my own actions and that change is inevitable. Nah, that’s too big a lesson for today. Maybe if scary changes came complete with that “new car smell” we might be a little less averse to them. Although, all things considered, I prefer the scent of dark chocolate…just sayin’.
So the smell of dark chocolate would make scary change palatable for you, Kario! Edible too! For me it would be the smell of earth after a rain shower or bread baking or chili simmering. If change is on the horizon for you, I hope you'v stockpiled the chocolate.
I love the smell of a new car. Engine fire? Not so much.
Actually…new car smell gives me a headache. Maybe that's why I drive a 1993 minivan! If only a car could smell like chocolate.
HI Kario,
I sense change is coming . . . ? I loved this part, even though you re-thought about it, "Maybe the trick is to remember that 'control' is an illusion except when it comes to my own actions and that change is inevitable."
Truly, all change would be much easier to tolerate if it smelled like dark chocolate. Hm-m, that sounds good right about now!
I think everything goes better with the scent of chocolate. Although new car smell tickles my fancy as well. Thoughtful and insightful post, as always.